So I'm looking to find out how you handle birthdays for your kids.Background - Growing up my parent's didn't have money to spend or time to put into birthdays. We would get a present and a birthday meal (we could pick what mom made). My birthday is the day before my brother's so we had to share a birthday meal. As soon as I learned to cook/bake I was in charge of making out birthday cake as well. The exception was my 16th birthday, my mom got a cake for me at our church youth group party. It meant a lot to me.
Birthdays just weren't a big deal in our family. They still aren't. Yesterday we got together for joint birthday dinner and my mom forgot to bake the cake. Kinda bugged me, but at least she made an effort at her age(70). Ryan, however, was crushed that there was no birthday cake for me. It was really sweet.
So now as a parent I'm trying to decide what to do for my kids' birthdays. So far I've done family birthday parties (both sides invited to the same day) with a couple of our close friends & their kids included. Ryan's going to be turning 4 in a couple of months and I don't know what to do.
What are your traditions/plans for your kids?
6 comments:
My birthdays growing up were the same as yours. Mom made the supper and bought a cake. When I was 7 I even made a sign for myself saying Happy Birthday and telling how old I was. Now that was just plain sad. But when you are the youngest of 11 that is what you get I guess.
So my vow as a mom was to make my children's birthdays special. After all, Jesus' birthday is really special and we spend a whole season preparing for it. I don't mean that I go all out, but since we don't have family here, we invite our friends, and I let them tell me the theme that they want. I decorate, make party bags, make the cake if I have a great idea, and buy presents. The best website in the world for ideas is www.birthdaypartyideas.com. It has tons of other moms and dads who write stories of what they did for their particular themed party. My kids are excited every year for their birthday to come around. And I know by blessing them with a great party, they will be grateful later on.
Think about how it made you feel that your birthday was not all that celebrated. I guess I see it as a time and place to tell/show your child how very much you love and appreciate them and to just celebrate them. A time where they stand apart from their sibling(s)...a day of their very own where they are the focus and you can impress into them just how special they are and how God made them unique and you wouldn't want to have any other child than them. Yes, you can do that without a party and gifts...so that's your choice but sometimes we just need to speak their language and cake and presents is their language. ha!
As for our family, we set aside $100 for each person's birthday. For the kids, I need to make sure that their party and or gifts don't go over $100. This year, I gave Logan a choice...no party/bigger gift or party/smaller gift. He chose party and smaller gift.
My parents (especially mom)made a big deal of our birthdays. I don't mean that we got TONNES of presents (my parents didn't have the money) or had huge parties. The first birthday party I had with friends invited over was for my 13th birthday party. The morning of our birthday, my mom would tell us our 'birth date' story. How we made our entrance into the world. How we LOVED to hear that. My mom would make our favorite meal, and a special birthday cake. It would be just us. We had way too many cousins (over 100) to invite over. I think my dad's mom would come sometimes (can't remember) I never felt put out or anything because my mom made it a big deal.
For my kids, I tell them their birth day story. I go into their room, lay on their bed with them, as they are waking up, and go over that days events. How they were born (not gorey details.) We invite my parents and brother and his family over for supper. Total of 10 people. We spend between $100-200 on gifts, depending on what we can find. I let the kids pick what they want for their birthday meal, and what kind of cake they wanted. This year, my daughter wanted a 'dog' cake. My son, asked for a helicopter cake. We always have a blast. I also like Logzie's idea of giving them a choice of a party or gift. We don't have a lot of friends here, so that wouldn't work well. My kids seem to love our set up though.
I'm sorry that your birthday was such a bust. I love how your son felt for you. My son did that a while ago. Grandma (hubby's mom) brought gifts for everyone buyt me. Son asked "why did everyone get a present buy mommy". HA! Stumped grandma! I LOVED it!
Hi Jenelle..I came over from Logzie's blog. My birthdays were the same as yours growing up too, except we didn't get to pick the birthday meal. One year, my parents even forgot my birthday! So, I try to make birthdays a big deal around here. This is especially important to me, because all of our family lives 2 hrs away. So, when birthdays roll around, we dedicate a whole weekend to celebrating! The kids get a big party with friends and cousins, then the cousins get to spend the night and we have a big family party on Sunday. This is nice for everyone, because all the cousins get to have a weekend together, and the aunts & uncles get a night out without their kids. We're exhausted by the end of the weekend, but it's worth it!
Thanks for stopping in Kuckie and for your ideas. I'll stop by and check out your blog as well.
Our birthday parties growing up were much like yours. We would have the grandparents over for cake and ice cream and have a few presents.
My parents did go all out for us on the "big" birthdays - slumber party for the 10th, surprise kareoke party for the 13th, and for me, I got to go to the prom on my 16th. That was super special.
With my kids, we've always made a big deal out of their birthdays. I think a lot of it has to do with my "guilt" of working full time. For each kid, their birthday is the one day where I can really show them how special they are to us. We've had pretty big birthday parties with grandparents, cousins, etc. I try to involve the kids in as much planning as they want to be involved with...they get to pick the kind of party, the cake, etc. This year for Kate's birthday, I made all of the decorations and spent less than $20 for everything (except for food).
Even though they're young, my kids have great memories of their parties, and actually look forward to each other's birthdays because they know it'll be fun.
One thing we've done to save money is ask grandparents, aunts and uncles, etc. to pitch in together for a present (it's totally optional, of course). This way the kids can get one really awesome present instead of many presents that get forgotten even before they're played with.
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